Craig Eisele on …..

July 17, 2012

Sex so hot it’ll melt your face…

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mr. Craig @ 9:42 pm

Components of a Successful Relationship

I’ve been thinking about sex lately.  Well, not just sex, but about the components of a happy relationship and what attracts people to each other.  In my mind, the components of a (successful) relationship are:

  • Physical Chemistry (sexual compatibility)
  • Physical Attraction (separate from physical chemistry)
  • Personal Chemistry (non-physical bond that forms through communication)
  • Personal Attraction (Mental, Intellectual, Family, Goals, etc.)
  • Trust
  • Respect

I split physical and personal chemistry and attraction because, in my experience, you can have one but not the other.  You can think someone is ‘hot’ but when it comes to the sex it falls flat.  No one part of a relationship can or should make a relationship, but each one can potentially break it.  What can break a relationship can vary for everyone, though.  For example, of the above components say your relationship lacks physical chemistry but all of the other components are A+.  Some people may be ok with this type of relationship – perhaps physical chemistry and/or attraction aren’t a high priority.  I think this particular situation is ok as long as both people agree on what’s important and what can slide.  When two people disagree it’s bound to become a problem sooner or later.

As I’ve gotten older (and presumably wiser) I’m less inclined to compromise on any of the above criteria – I want it all.  Shouldn’t we want the ‘complete package’, after all?  If we don’t, doesn’t that mean we’re settling somehow?  That then raises the question of how soon should you feel the pull of the attraction?  How long do you give it to see if a particular area of attraction has the potential to grow before you throw in your chips that it’s just not there?  Physical attraction can be immediate; physical chemistry can improve over time as you get to know one another and what the other person likes and doesn’t like. Personal chemistry and attraction can also be great right from the beginning as well.  Trust and respect often must be earned.

How long does it take you before you know if the chemistry and attraction is there?  Have you ever ignored any of the above that was lacking and it came around to bite you in the buttocks?

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